“Embracing the life God has given us is far better than just surviving. It is purposefully living in the present, acknowledging what is hard, and choosing to trust in the middle of it. It is welcoming where we are in life while honestly grieving what we wish were different. It is facing and naming our disappointments, but not letting them define us.”
The Hardest Time of Year by Vaneetha Randall Risner
Hey friends! This is my first Christmas being away from home!!! It’s no doubt usually such a sweet time // the “most wonderful time” of the year that a lot of us look forward to: family time and traditions, great food, red and green wrapping paper and christmas lights, and a lot of hugs and smiles.
I wanted to be real with you guys and let you enter into my world of thoughts and emotions during this Christmas time. It’s been hard to really meditate on Jesus more than grieving what I wish were different. I am wishing things were different in some aspects of my life because #1.) I didn’t think some aspects of my life would change while being on this mission trip, and therefore #2.) I didn’t see/envision those changes coming, which has me wanting to wish them away.
So, this Christmas hasn’t been 100% depressing, but it hasn’t been the most wonderful time emotionally, and that’s okay. I’ve randomly gotten hit with many emotions throughout the day, and so, I’m not good at faking a smile, and force myself to feel happy. It’s been such a blessing for my team and I to be there for one another when we’re going through our highs and lows. We’re very clear that there is a joy that could never be taken from us no matter how we feel: Jesus. The birth of Jesus is at all times a thing to celebrate, and I’m so happy we have a holiday to specifically do so. It’s an act, a statement and a lived-out act and statement from God that HE IS WITH US.
I really love the quote above because the Lord helped me see that I can take actions while feeling low… I can feel what I feel, but I don’t have to stay there. And so,
I will embrace Jesus.
I will purposefully live in the present with my team and my family however it may look like, regardless if I am not used to it.
I will acknowledge what is hard for me right now.. and choose to trust and depend on Jesus, and trust my team, and my family.
I will welcome the fact that this year is different and that even though I didn’t see these emotions and hardships coming… that God did, and that He’s holding me so tight and knows how to love me through it. He is also working through them… so, that’s good!!!
I want to face and name my disappointments, and have conversations about them with the Lord and also my team, because I know they want to walk with me through that. I want to be aware of my disappointments so that I wont let those things define me… because in the end, they really don’t.
Through thick and thin, Jesus is King, and I am so thankful to live in that everyday of my life even when I don’t always feel those rainbow & unicorn–feelings. Jesus has got me, and He’s got you too, if you put your full trust in Him.
Merry Christmas,
J
Throwback to last years Christmas and now!
